To Trixie ,
Hey , im sorry for not talking to you on Friday . i dont mean to do that . i wasnt angry with you . I am not mad at you either . Its just that i dunno what to do , i dont know what to say to make things better . Im afraid that when i say something , its gonna be a wrong one . i dont wish to say the wrong thing to make a whole lot of mess again .. I dont blame you for confronting her .. cause we agreed on doing that and i was stupid enough to do so . cause now , we agreed and she dont talk to me ..you say that she dont know how to face me .. and i know that is not gonna be a good thing ..  i know she's not gonna talk to me unless i start first . But im afraid of being the first one to start a conversation with her . cause i know her expression will make me feel like i am a piece of SHYT . So , yeah . im here to apologize to you for that . and everything .

To you , cassandra
im sorry . i think that is all i know what to say to you . cause i dont know what more i can say . i am afraid of making you angry cause i know you will be if i say something wrong . so yeah i have to shut my mouth up . i will talk to you  but i have to try .

Labels: I want you back badly . but its time for me to let go .

Oh . I thought of forgiving and forgetting about it , but I guess now , whatever I do , she's still gonna hate me . But I have no choice . Trixie is suffering . What can she do ? She have to tell her how she feel . And I think because she told her , tomorrow gonna be a bad day .. But I know how Trixie feel , I don't blame her at all .. We shall see how it goes tomorrow .. Yeah ? Okay .. Haha ..

Faking a smile do help sometimes
.
.
.
But it hurts .

Labels: It hurts us but you don't know ..

hi smelly fish, i knwo yu cant let this thing off easily cause she hurted you way too many times . So yeah i REALLY do RESPECT your desicion . But to me , i think the only way to make things right is to forgive and forget . Look at the positive side of her and ignore the negative side , that is what im doing . im not acting to be her her friend . i am truely being her friend . An act will sooner or later be revealed , so think about it babe . Everyone has a KIND SOUL . Its just how you show it to others . So yea . No one thinks that you are the bad one . No one have the rigths to do so , only you can say yourself and oin-pont at yourself . But then , loving yourself and not saying that you yourself is bad is the only way to build yourself up again (: CHEER UP BABE :D I'll let you go back to OIL LAND as soon as you are fine again :D

Labels: trust in yourself

Is making things Right wrong ? I just want us to be best friends again .. I don't want our friendship to be like last time .. You and C having war and I will be the middle person , dunno who to hang out with . Cause I don't wish to be spending more time with one of them and neglecting the other one at the same time . I know I am selfish thinking about only myself . But I also don't want this friendship to be like this . So the best thing is to forgive and forget . I know you don't hate her .. You just dislike her . And so the best is to look at the positive side of her and forget about it .. I'm sorry if I offended you .. But I don't want to be stuck in the middle once again ..

Labels: Forgive and forget .

today i concentrated in class . im surpised that i did . cause normaly i dont (: haha . wanted to confront her today but failed to cause me and trixie not in the mood to do so . Then today after school , we went to com lab to do our home econs . then we did till 2.30 . then when we got down , she was lke not happy like tht == we did ask her if she want go with us derhhz lorhhz .. is she herself dont want go com lab woth us derhhz lorhhz .. then we got down she give black face == she is like pang seh us how many times liao ? when we needed her , she will go with the boys and have lots of fun , regardless wether it hurt us anot . Then when she need us , we are like always there for her . Its like kind of unfair though . i feel like telling her off . But then thinking about those values i learnt ' look at the positive side of a person and ignore the negative ' , i shall just let this thing off .. but if she did something that freaking hurt us again , im not gonna give a effing damn anout it . cause we treated her as a true friend , but she treated us like slave , dogs and rag doll . we are not your stupid slave okay . get the FACT right . and i hate treated like a freaking rag doll . thnking that you can come and be with us when you need us and throw us aside when you have your boys .. freaking NO WAY !

Thinking about it , im really agreeing with what xinping ask . why the boys are always on her side . i wonder why too . but i know the reason why liao . cause to her , boys are very important .. without boys , she will not be happy , its like in her life , boys are the ones that keep her alive . She treated the girlfriends so differently from how she treated her boyfriends .. she treat her girlfriends like dog but she is acting like the guys slave , always doing stuffs for them . i feel like screaming at the guys asking them to see properly that this girl is not a true friend at all ! cant they just see ? why is it that they always see through me and trixie but forever not HER ? what is so special about her ? Her charm ? i dont know . i really hope that the guys do read my blog , cause i think they should really see the real her ..

Labels: i tried to believe every word your sweet story

Took 162 with ChiaHuey today (: YAY ! Haha . Had Fun (: after morning assembly at the hall , she was cause by mrs Ng for her tucked out shirt , I think her skirt too loose lerhhz . LOL . Waited for her then go to homero together . Kana ask to stand just because never do research by LLL sia ! Then I think because we waited for ChiaHuey without telling YOU , then you not happy with us larhhz . It's like you pangseh us howany times Liao ? We also never give you Amy face larhhz , we pangseh you ..for our good friend also give face -.- what kind of friend are you ? Then math lesson you started talking to us . But we are still abit don't want talk to you cause we know that you talk to us because you need companion . Am I right ? I hate people who treat friends like rubbish bin larhhz -.- you are like , cannot survive without boys like that sia .. You want to talk to them about me nevermind larhhz . But not every single day what . It's not like I can do anything to help you . Even if I want to help you , you also won't trust that I will do it well larhhz . Every single time I help you , there is never a once you fully put your trust into me . You always think that I will screw everything up instead . But why don't you trust me ? I think the only person you trust are your BOYS . That is what I really think larhhz .. Can't you just stop being so freaking egoistic ? Every single time , you only want to talk about your stuff , when I tell you mine , you will either don't bltherbor you will just change topic . Come on larhhz I have feelings one okay ? Nevermind

Labels: I dunno how to be fine when I'm not

You may have flaws , but all your flaws are not seen by all the other people . Why ? I can see it why can't others see it ? Even if you do something wrong , people will just forgive you easily like nothing happened before . You are always having the love other people wish to have but they just can't . I wonder what is the reason . But I can't find the reason . People are envy of you , I am jealous of you , but I won't hate you. Cause you are a nice friend . But sometimes I really hope that you would realized what you did us actually hurting some people including me. I don't hate you at all , I just dislike part of your attitude . You are always the one who saved the day , when people are in needs , you will help . But if you are not the leader can you just give the leader to have a chance to voice out ? I am not asking much from you , I just want the old you back like how you were in sec one . Honestly larhhz , you did changed alot in sec 2 but we didn't tell you because we hope that you would realize this yourself. But it seems that you still don't know . We still don't want to tell you because we are afraid that you will hate us or maybe don't want to talk to us . We don't want this friendship to be ruin just because of this . Hope you do know .. I think if I am the one who did something wrong , people would be pin pointing me like I am murderer .. They wounldnt forgive me as easily as how they forgive you .. I am sure about that . Cause to them , you are like the best friend they ever wanted ..

Labels: Only if my dreams are as real as real life .

Sian , in half an hour time , im gonna have 3 hours of CHEENA tuition D: gonna be damn bored larhhz . somebody text me please ? LOL Tomorrow Sports Carnival lohh , Peirce workout is still somehow in a mess but hope that everything will be perfect by tomorrow . Thanks lynt for helping out (: you make our dance more lively :D thanks , i appreciate that . HAHA sorry for being agngry at the very first part D: haha . Thanks Trixie and Cass for helping out ! i am a leader and yet i do nothing . SORRY D: thanks once again :D got to go tuition soon , bye bye (:

Labels: wish that it was just a crazy thought .

I'm thinking , why can't I be you . I am not jealous of you , I am just thinking that you are perfect and wondering why am I not you . It's like you get to have everything you want and everything that you like and you kind of not appreciate it and take it for granted , and yet god still wants to give you more . But what is the thing that I or WE didnt do that you do and make god thinks that you deserve what you want ? I don't think there is , but of there really is , then I'm still trying to figure out . God created me and I love me , but sometimes I just want to be a part of you and many parts of me . I know it sounds wrong but I dunno how rephrase it , just hope that your understands what I'm saying then . LOL . I hope that things will change for the better though ._. exam is coming (; everyone jiayou (: haha good luck . U know I long time no update Liao , but will try to update as soon ad possible (: haha . Am laughing crazily for no reason is real fun , cause you can't control your laughter at all and you will feel the fun when there's no fun in it at all :D

Labels: When everything changes ..